Chickens in the House Tomorrow Night! Celebrate Freedom with Us and Get in Final Votes on Patriotic Ties!

Tomorrow night, weather permitting, we will have a live petting farm on the grounds with sheep and goats to pet and even some chickens to go along with our Summer Cinema presentation of CHICKEN RUN! Be sure to join us early for the fun. The animals will be ready for visitors beginning at 5:30pm for those who arrive early and will remain until after our movie intermission.

Also, remind your kids to bring their offering for their Film Star Team's bucket!

FINAL REMINDER: Tomorrow night is the absolute last chance to vote on your favorite Patriotic Tie and support BGMC!

Current top 3 are:

President Tie: $31.31

God Bless America Button Tie: $29.68

Pom Pom Tie: $24.52

The next highest is at $11.70 and the rest are under $10! We need more votes! Come on, parents and grandparents! Are you going to let your child's tie end up at the bottom? Can you give those few extra bucks to catapult your child's tie to first place? Tomorrow night is your last chance to make a difference towards the contest AND our BGMC goal!

10 Ways to Handle Discipline Issues, Yea Verily Even 11

Audra, an All Pro Dads Play of the Day subscriber, writes, "When my 7-year-old son got into trouble at school, I required him to write an apology to his teacher. In his neatest handwriting, my son had to state the offense, write a sentence taking responsibility for the offense and promising not to do it again."

Thanks, Audra, for the great idea! And it doesn't have to stop with teachers. Having your child write a note to his mother, his sibling, his grandparents etc. can be an excellent and classy way for him to make up for an offense.

Here are 10 more ways to Handle Discipline issue with your kids:

1.The Do-Over
Everybody deserves a second chance right? If your child has shown a lack of respect in some way, give them the option of a “do-over.” Send them out of the room, and have them start all over again. In most cases, the second time around will be much more appropriate.

2.Zip it
Children have a knack for saying all types of off-the-wall things. Sometimes they go too far, and feelings might get hurt. Sometimes, it’s just a lot of noise. Speaking can cause a variety of troubles that requires discipline. Losing the privilege to talk for a specific time is a great tool to curb these situations. Have them zip those lips and learn how to be respectful towards others.

3.Let them win
Every single issue does not need to be a battle. If you are constantly at odds with your child, resentment can breed, and ears can eventually tune out. Sometimes, it’s best to let your child “win.” For example: Your child might not dress for school exactly how you would like. They are within a standard of decency, but not quite your taste. Yet, they are making excellent grades. If your suggestions on how they look are met with resistance, it may be OK to let it go. Your child will appreciate having some authority over their own life, and learn how to give and take. Pick your battles.

4.Take a breather
Every parent’s best friend is the “breather.” If your child screams at you, screaming back will only worsen the matter. Send him to his room and create a cooling off period. Just make sure he doesn’t take his iPod or cell phone! Then approach him when he has calmed down and talk through the matter.

5.Use the rod rarely
“Spare the rod, spoil the child.” We all know this ancient wisdom, but it must be used with extreme caution. Many studies have shown that using violence, even in a mild form, only creates fear and may do nothing to better a child. It can be tough at times, but always keep your composure. If need be, walk away. Using your mind, and not always your hands, might be the best way to discipline.

6.The “I told you so”
Your child has known a project was due for 2 weeks. It is the night before, and she is in a panic. You warned her a week ago not to wait until the last moment, but it happened anyway. She is now pleading for you to assist her. Do not help her and let her experience the result of her actions. It will be embarrassing for her the next day at school when her project pales in comparison to others. Maybe it will mean a bad grade. This will teach her far more than you having done the work for her. You can say to yourself, “I told you so.” Just don’t say it out loud.

7.Compromise
Every child has things he does not want to do. It could be brushing his teeth, going to bed on time, or taking a bath. Of course all these things have to be done and the daily battle can become a drag. Try a little compromise instead of always verbally forcing them. When “Son, it’s time to brush your teeth” is met with an escape down the hall, grab his favorite toy and say “Mr. Rex is coming with you, so he can brush his teeth too!” Suddenly it has become fun, and your son is happily brushing his teeth with Mr. Rex by his side. Compromise and improvise when appropriate.

8.The Take Away
Every child has something near and dear to them. It is not underhanded for that item to come into play if needed. Favorite stuffed animals, cell phones, gaming devices, etc. can all be used to your benefit. If your warnings have fallen on deaf ears, take an item away for a stated time and let your child once again learn that actions have consequences.

9.Grounding
The time honored classic. We’ve all been there, and so will your child sooner or later. It is not easy to tell your big, brown-eyed daughter she can’t go to the movies with her friends or to the school dance. Be strong! Whatever it was that got things to this point was dire enough that a strong response was called for. It won’t be pretty, but it’s your job, and it is just one of many things she will thank you for later in life.

10.Prevention
“Head ‘em off at the pass,” the old cowboys used to say. As a parent, you most likely know your child better than they know themselves. Use that insight to stop potential problems before they ever occur. Talk openly with your child on a daily basis. Reward her for the many great things she does. Praise her with lots of love for her achievements. Building a high level of trust and understanding with your child will prevent a great deal of issues that would require a discipline tactic. As the saying goes, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure”.

BGMC Weekend: Last Weekend to Vote on Patriotic Ties & Support BGMC!

This is the last weekend for judging Patriotic Ties with your giving! We'll keep the ties out for next Wednesday night and then that's it! Tie Judging will end. So don't miss your opportunity to vote! Remember that the tie that gets the most money in its Buddy Barrel will be worn by Pastor Kevin next Sunday, the 4th of July, our next Family Service. 2nd place will be worn by Pastor Ron, and so on right down the list of Pastors and Trustees! What a way to celebrate our independence AND missions!

Of course, it's also BGMC Missions Weekend, so remind your kids to bring their Buddy Barrels to the Playhouse this weekend!

Why a Bedtime is Important

One of the gifts parents can give their children is teaching and developing the character quality of self-discipline. With young children, in particular, bedtime is a good place to start. Children often don't want to go to bed and the continual battle night after night is draining, causing many parents to just give up and allow children to stay up later.

A bedtime for children is good for them as well as for their parents. Enforcing it though, means extra work for a while. Here are some suggestions for working with young children to make bedtimes work more effectively.

1) Start the bedtime routine earlier so that it doesn't all get crammed into the last few minutes. If bedtime is 8:00 pm then start the routine at 7:30 by getting on pajamas and completing a bathroom routine. Then enjoy some relaxed time with children, reading or playing or just talking together.

2) At bedtime, tuck each child in individually. Use this time to continue to debrief about the day in preparation for a good night sleep and pleasant dreams. You may pray, sing, and hug your child. Different families do different things to make it fun and meaningful.

3) Enforce quietness. A child may not feel tired so lying quietly is all you need to require. You may have to sit in the doorway or just outside the door to make sure the child doesn't get up, turn the light on, or start playing.

4) If a child gets up or calls out. Quickly, calmly, and firmly, get the child back in bed with as little dialogue as possible. One dad was surprised to find that the first night he had to take his three-year-old son back to bed over 20 times. After a few days, though, he saw tremendous improvement. His son realized that bedtime was nonnegotiable.

5) Hang in there, be consistent, and invest in the self-discipline development of your child. You and your children will benefit from the work you put into the process.

Bedtimes are opportunities to build relationship, but there comes a point where building self-discipline takes priority. Young children are happier and more pleasant to work with once they've learned self-discipline in their lives. It's work but it's worth it in the end.


What are some ideas you've found helpful to teach your children self discipline at bedtime?
Click here to tell us about it.


This parenting tip is from the book, Home Improvement, The Parenting Book You Can Read to Your Kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Tarzan: A Lesson about Belonging in the Family of God

Tomorrow night, we're busting out the jungle vines again for movie number 2 in our Summer Cinema outreach, TARZAN! Remind your kids to invite their friends for a great movie on a great big screen and a lesson about belonging to the family of God! Since we're in a jungle with animals, we'll be feasting on animal crackers too! Also, the kids were challenged to come up with some kind of offering bucket or container that fits the name and mascot of their small "movie star" group. For example, The Gorilla Guys might want to bring in an african drum toy or a plastic coconut to put their offering in or the Potato Heads might want to bring in a Mr. Potato Head toy to put theirs in. Remind your kids of this challenge and have them collaborate with their other team mates for tomorrow night.

The fun starts at 6:15!

Relationship Builds Responsiveness

Many parents see a problem and start giving instructions immediately. This often means that they yell across the parking lot or bark commands from the other side of the house. We believe this approach isn't the best. It's not enough to see the need and tell someone to respond to it. That approach doesn't demonstrate value for the relationship. Parenting isn't just about getting tasks done; it's about building relationships at the same time.

Start by getting close to your child. Most of the time this means that before you give an instruction you call your child over to you. This presents a problem in many young families because preschoolers often don't come when they're called. The fact is, even older children don't come when they're called unless they are taught to do so.

Take time to teach your children how to come when you call them. It takes practice but it's well worth the work. Parents often ask, "What do I do in the grocery store when I call my preschooler and he runs away?" Well, the grocery store isn't the place to practice. That's the final exam! By practicing over and over at home and at the park, children are then able to respond in public.

Like every step in a good instruction routine, getting close to each other requires changes from both child and parent. Children also find it tempting to yell across the house. Now children learn that dialogue only takes place when relationship has been established through eye contact and being physically close together. Sometimes it's the small things that demonstrate that a parent cares or that a child is willing to listen. Putting down the paper, looking up from the computer, or just turning to face your child before you speak communicates the importance of what you are about to say.

Some parents report major improvement in a child's responsiveness when they just implement this step and give instructions only when the child is within a few feet. Sometimes that little nonverbal statement about your relationship is all that's needed to gain a more cooperative attitude from your child.

And what if that doesn't work? Well, it's only the first step. Four more steps are yet to come and you can read about them in the book, Good and Angry, Exchanging Frustration for Character In You and Your Kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.