One of the reasons that single parenting is a challenge is that when kids need help, there's often only one place to get it: you. That means that phone calls may come at inopportune moments for you as a parent.
You might get a call at work like, "Mom, I'm at school but I forgot my lunch," or "Mom, Tony and I are at home and he's being obnoxious. Could you tell him to stop?" You, by the way, happen to be in an office full of people with little privacy.
Crisis phone calls aren't emergencies but they are times when your children are stuck and need your leadership to help them get unstuck.
Do you and your children know how to solve these problems without you yelling in the phone or going back and forth from one child to the other? Spend some time talking to your children about what you expect or how you want those phone calls to go.
Here are some suggestions for dealing with crisis phone calls:
1) Children have to learn that when they call, they may have to wait or be called back.
2) You need to take time to listen and ask questions to understand as much of the problem as possible. Only talk to one child at a time. Be empathetic. It's okay that your child called. You don't want to sound like you're too busy to talk. You want your kids to call you when they need help.
3) You may have to give temporary advice but most importantly, take time to teach children how to get out of this problem themselves next time. You are equipping your children.
4) Children must be able to accept the answer and end the phone call graciously whether they like the solution or not. No hang-ups.
Crisis phone calls are a great teaching opportunity. You may look at them as a nuisance but they can actually be quite productive.
Jesus never got a crisis phone call but people who were in crisis often interrupted him. He took time with the woman who had been bleeding for eleven years, with the man whose daughter was sick, with the father of a boy who had convulsions. Jesus was the kind of person you could interrupt. Are you that kind of person? If you're a single parent you have to be able to handle crisis interruptions with grace. It's not easy, but it's worth it in the end.
This idea was taken from the CD series, Single Parenting, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.
You might get a call at work like, "Mom, I'm at school but I forgot my lunch," or "Mom, Tony and I are at home and he's being obnoxious. Could you tell him to stop?" You, by the way, happen to be in an office full of people with little privacy.
Crisis phone calls aren't emergencies but they are times when your children are stuck and need your leadership to help them get unstuck.
Do you and your children know how to solve these problems without you yelling in the phone or going back and forth from one child to the other? Spend some time talking to your children about what you expect or how you want those phone calls to go.
Here are some suggestions for dealing with crisis phone calls:
1) Children have to learn that when they call, they may have to wait or be called back.
2) You need to take time to listen and ask questions to understand as much of the problem as possible. Only talk to one child at a time. Be empathetic. It's okay that your child called. You don't want to sound like you're too busy to talk. You want your kids to call you when they need help.
3) You may have to give temporary advice but most importantly, take time to teach children how to get out of this problem themselves next time. You are equipping your children.
4) Children must be able to accept the answer and end the phone call graciously whether they like the solution or not. No hang-ups.
Crisis phone calls are a great teaching opportunity. You may look at them as a nuisance but they can actually be quite productive.
Jesus never got a crisis phone call but people who were in crisis often interrupted him. He took time with the woman who had been bleeding for eleven years, with the man whose daughter was sick, with the father of a boy who had convulsions. Jesus was the kind of person you could interrupt. Are you that kind of person? If you're a single parent you have to be able to handle crisis interruptions with grace. It's not easy, but it's worth it in the end.
This idea was taken from the CD series, Single Parenting, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.
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