FINAL NIGHT FOR UGLY TIE VOTING!!

IMPORTANT NOTICE:  Tonight is the final night to cast your monetary vote for your favorite Ugly Tie!  Remember that the ties that make the most money will be worn by the Pastoral Staff this Sunday for the Graduation/Awards Service so get those final $20s in those cups before it's too late!  It's all for Missions!!

FINAL AWANA CLUB NIGHT FOR 2011-12 YEAR!

     This is IT!!  The final night of another great year of Awana clubs!  Have your kids finished all their verses and sections to complete their current book?  If not, they've got mere hours to make it so.  This Sunday we give out those book awards as well as graduation certificates during the 10:30am service so tonight is the deadline to finish!  It's also our big end of the year celebration night!

Of course, we have a final theme night for our final club night:  CLUB LEADER APPRECIATION NIGHT!!  Remind your kids to write up a nice "Thank You" note or card to their club director/leaders.  When they check in tonight they will get extra points for their color team for each card they show them at the check-in table.  I hope you will encourage your children to put some thought into these notes, not for points, but because their leaders are worth it and have given their all this year to make Wednesday nights full of fun and excitement!

Make Parenting Shifts

As children grow and mature, parents must make adjustments in the way they parent. Some of those changes are minor or subtle; others are more significant. In the same way that children go through developmental stages, parents must learn to adapt by shifting the way they interact, care for, and discipline their children. Just when you think you've got it all figured out, your child changes and you feel like you're starting all over again.

For instance, when that tiny newborn comes home from the hospital, the baby quickly becomes the focus of attention. The infant sets the schedule for feedings and for sleeping. Often both parents have to adapt their lives around one small child. However, as your baby begins to grow and develop, you change too. You no longer jump for every cry. You begin to set limits on a mobile child and determine a meal schedule for a toddler. One major parenting shift takes place when infants become toddlers.

A common parenting mistake happens when parents don't make the teenage parenting shift. They continue to treat their teens as if they were nine or ten years old. Parents who don't make the necessary adjustments, experience increased friction and frustration in family dynamics. As children mature, parents can now communicate with them in a more adult manner by listening and explaining. Change comes through compromise and mutual agreement rather than always strictly complying with the parents' instructions.

Teens need more discussion about issues and concerns. Discipline involves more explaining and talking rather than just requiring compliance. A parent may say, "I'm not going to make you give your little brother one of the cookies you made for school, but I'd like to talk about it. I'd like to hear what you're thinking because it seems selfish to me."

As your children grow, be ready to grow with them and make the necessary changes to influence them effectively.

This tip comes from the chapter on teens in the book Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes In You and Your Kids by Dr Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

SPORTS Theme Night at Awana Clubs This Week!!

Remind your kids to wear their favorite sports team wear to Awana clubs this week!  It can be Football, Basketball, Baseball, Soccer, Hockey, etc.  College or Pro, either is fine.  And mixing sports and teams is fine too!  Wear it all from head to foot and have fun with it!  We'll be giving extra points for the team that shows the most "team" spirit.

Tweens Cell Phones: Does Your Child Need a Cell Phone?

More than 75 percent of teenagers have cell phones.  That doesn’t even include children as young as six who are getting phones.

We understand that the pace of life causes families to simultaneously run in multiple directions: work meetings, soccer practice, piano lessons, etc. It’s a wonderful convenience to be able to redirect or rearrange transportation on the fly with your kids. Other parents value the safety aspect of giving their children a phone. But moms must weigh these pluses against a growing list of cons to decide if having a phone is a good thing for your child.

1. Is it about status or need? Admit it: while we usually blame our kids for wanting what the “in crowd” has, we can also fall victim to that type of thinking. But just because the majority of her friends have something doesn’t mean that she should.
   We at iMOM highly recommend that you put off giving your child a cell phone with Internet access as long as you can.  Basically, a smartphone can be used as a distracting and addictive toy, and it opens the doorway to a hazardous world via the Internet. [How much phone does your child need?]
2. Does the schedule demand it? For working parents whose young children need to navigate a school bus drop-off or make it to an after-school activity alone, there may be a legitimate need. Just knowing that if something goes wrong your child can reach you or another caregiver can provide great piece of mind. But if you drop your child off at school and pick them up, and they can call you from the school office if they need you in-between, a cell phone is more of a social tool than an emergency tool.
3. Does your child handle other responsibilities well? How consistently your child obeys the rules regarding other types of technology she already has access to (internet, TV, video games) is a good indicator of how well she will respect and obey the rules you lay down for cell phone use. If you’re constantly having to police and correct your child’s use of other media, you’ll have an even greater battle on your hands with the cell phone, because she’ll be using it outside of your sight 99 percent of the time. Think long and hard before you open Pandora’s box.
4. Do you have the backbone to limit its use and take it away? Some parents find it really difficult to take back a privilege or gift once it’s given. Only you know if you have the resolve to do what’s best for your child—despite the tears and protests—if the phone becomes a problem. If you can’t honestly say that you’ll pull the plug, and set limitations, don’t buy the phone.

Team Color Night at Awana Clubs Tomorrow!

As we kick off our last month of Awana clubs, let's show some team spirit one last time by wearing our Awana team colors tomorrow night!  The more the better!  Don't just stop with the shirt.  Wear your team color in socks, pants, hats, accessories.  Make it look like someone threw a can of your teams color paint on you!

And call your fellow team mates and remind them to do the same.  PK might just keep teams on their proper colors for game time even if the teams are unbalanced... maybe!  (We'll see how unbalanced they turn out.)

Sleepover Strategies

So, your child's been invited to a sleepover at a friend's house. ..

1. Be willing to be your child's scapegoat

If you sense that your child doesn't want to go, or you think she's just not ready, tell your child, "You can tell your friend I said no."

2. Create alternatives

If "everyone" is going to a sleepover, and your child doesn't want to go, or you don't want her to go, come up with a fun alternative: invite friends over, ask your child's grandparents to do something with them, or do something exciting as a family.

3. Host the sleepover at your house

That way, you set the guidelines, and your child will feel more secure.

4. Cultivate new friendships

Try to expand your child's friendship circle beyond his school.  Encourage him to make friends with kids through sports, church or other activities.  That way, if "all" of the kids in his class are going to the sleepover, he'll have other friends to spend time with.

Sleepover Criteria by Age

Elementary School

• Must know parents well.

Middle School (This age group tends to want to spend the night out the most)

• Must know parents well, and make sure they're going to be there the entire evening.
• Be aware of any older siblings and other older kids who may be there also.
• If your child is girl, and her friend has older brothers, automatic no.

High School

• Sleepovers are rare.
• You want your children to come home after a night out, so you can check for signs of drinking or drug use.

Note:  Even if your kids go out for prom or homecoming with friends, require them to still spend the night at home.

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Voting Begins! (Ugly Ties on Display this Sunday)

(Ties from 2009!)

IF YOUR CHILD HAS NOT BROUGHT IN AN UGLY TIE YET, MAKE SURE THEY GET THEM DONE THIS WEEKEND AND BRING THEM TO CHURCH ON SUNDAY.  THERE'S STILL ROOM FOR MORE ON THE TABLE AND VOTING BEGINS THIS WEEK!  SO IT'S NOT TOO LATE!

Judge Deborah: Mother of Israel

How's that for timing?  Without even planning it, we managed to get to the ONE JUDGE that was a woman on Mother's Day!  So this Sunday, we'll be coming at Mother's Day from a little different slant, but it'll be fun as always and your kids will learn a thing or two about encouragement when it's all over.

In addition, this is our May Birthday celebration Sunday, so if your child has a birthday this month, make sure they're here for their birthday treat.

Blessing Ceremony vs Rite of Passage (Celebrating Manhood too early)

When I determined to establish a passage rite to manhood for my son (and next one coming), I decided that this would be a time when I could look into my son's eyes (and have other significant men in his life join me in doing so) and declaring to him that we now consider him a spiritual brother and a fellow man. I just cannot seeing that occurring at such younger ages (15 and under). I have raised astute and "street smart" boys (my bag professionally is Law Enforcement). I considered my sons' ahead of the emotional and spiritual maturity curve compared to their colleagues, but not having reached that "manhood" level until after they were into their 16th year. As well, my fellow guys agreed with me. If I were to have taken my oldest and pronounced him as earning manhood and equality with the rest of us men at 14, he would have been the first to have considered it "just a show" because there were so many areas where we would not/could not include him on the man equivalent level. From the moment we declared him Man (with the obvious exception of legal implications), all of us have treated him as an equal and he has recognized that. We have seen how it empowered him with confidence and purpose. That declaration now has true and lasting meaning to him because he knows we have lived up to our pledge to him.

I have no problem with blessing our sons as they enter adolescence, but I fully separate the concept of bestowing a "Blessing" to my son, from a "Rite of Passage into Manhood." For my family, anything less would have been just words, a great meal, and a present.

Family Week & Ugly Ties!

Another Family Week is upon us and we kick it off this Sunday with something special!  Since we are in the middle of collecting Ugly Ties for our next BGMC fundraiser which begins next Sunday (Mother's Day), we thought it would be fun to show off the ties this Sunday in our Family Service so people get a chance to start thinking about which tie they'll give their monetary vote to.  So we're going to do a little Ugly Tie parade during announcements and let the kids show off their own ties for once.  So if you're kids have already turned in their tie or bring one in by this Sunday, have them come and find PK or Aimee before 2nd service and we'll give them instructions and let them get their ties back for a few minutes.  It'll be fun so encourage your kids to get those ties done quick if they haven't already yet and bring them this Sunday!

The ties will be put out for display beginning Mother's Day next Sunday and will remain out for the month of May!

Family Ties to Faith

Connect busy families to a faith-filled outlook with these 10 time-savvy ideas!

Families are swamped. Schedules overflow with commitments. You hear or read about overextended families every day in the news. Yet there you sit, the children's minister at your church, politely -- albeit guiltily -- piping up with, "Excuse me, how can we get more faith development happening at home during the week?"

Though most families cringe at the thought of adding more activities or responsibilities to their calendars, many admit that they too would like to make time for faith growth -- if they had the right tools. Time, of course, is one of those tools.

So how can you help families and children focus on faith during the week? We've compiled 10 simple, quick ways you can help families weave faith into their everyday lives and build God-honoring habits -- without putting a dent in their schedules.

1. Cross Challenge
   
   Challenge families to play a seek-and-find game during the week. The objective is to find as many crosses hidden in everyday life as possible. Think telephone poles, signposts, seams on a basketball, and tons more. The goal is to make the game a habit, so families are continuously looking for crosses-and constantly reminded of Jesus. Remind families to share their findings at dinner each evening.
   
   Scripture: "We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God's throne. Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people; then you won't become weary and give up" (Hebrews 12:2-3).
2. In With the Good
   
   Give family members each a card with Philippians 4:8 printed on it. Ask them to think about the activity they do most-listen to music, watch TV, play video games, cook. Ask each person to place the card on the object or in the area where he or she does the activity. During the week, challenge family members to think about the positive side of their favorite activity and try to find one thing related to that activity that fits the verse and honors God, such as cooking food for family members, keeping in touch with friends, or choosing TV shows that have a positive message. Have them write what honors God on the card and keep it visible as a reminder to choose things in our lives that honor God.
   
   Scripture: "And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise" (Philippians 4:8).
3. Water: The Purifier
   
   Give each family member a bottle of water with the Scripture and questions attached. Tell families to refrigerate their water and drink a little each day, making it last a week. Ask them to read the verse each time they take a drink. Then during a meal, ask families to discuss these questions:
   • What do you think the "living water" is?
   • How is Jesus like or unlike the pure water in these bottles?
   • Why is water so important to us?
   • Why is Jesus so important to us?
   • How can we use water to remind us of God?

Scripture: "Jesus replied, 'Anyone who drinks this water will soon become thirsty again. But those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life' " (John 4:13-14).

4. Start With Jesus

Challenge families to choose one weekday to begin their morning with Jesus-before they do anything else. Encourage families to pray together or do one thing that honors Jesus. Encourage them to talk about the difference between the days they begin with Jesus and the days they don't.

Scripture: "I am 'the way, the truth, and the life' " (John 14:6).

5. Everlasting Light

Give families a decorative note to post in a room they all frequent or a place where every family member turns on and off the light.

Each time people flip the light switch, ask them to look at the note and remember that God offers a glorious light that'll never burn out.

Scripture: "No longer will you need the sun to shine by day, nor the moon to give its light by night, for the Lord your God will be your everlasting light, and your God will be your glory. Your sun will never set; your moon will not go down. For the Lord will be your everlasting light. Your days of mourning will come to an end" (Isaiah 60:19-20).

6. Self-Sacrifice

Challenge family members to each sacrifice something they enjoy during the week in order to help someone else; for example, giving up a TV program to help a sibling with homework or sacrificing Xbox time to set the table without being asked.

Scripture: "Don't be selfish; don't try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves" (Philippians 2:3).

7. Great Provider

Give family members each 10 pieces of yarn, 4 inches in length. Ask them to spend the next week thinking of the many ways God has provided for them. Challenge them to find 10 things they can tie a piece of yarn to (zipper pulls, rearview mirrors...) as a reminder of how God has provided. Encourage them to say a brief prayer of thanks whenever they see the yarn tied to something-whether it's theirs or another family member's.

Scripture: "And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?

"So don't worry about these things, saying, 'What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?' These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need" (Matthew 6:30-33).

8. Mending Relationships

Ask family members to each find something at home that needs to be mended. Encourage them to talk about why the items need repair. Then challenge each person to think about a relationship they need to mend and why they need to mend it. Challenge them to go to that person during the week and offer forgiveness, an apology, or whatever's needed to bring peace to that relationship.

Scripture: "So if you are presenting a sacrifice at the altar in the Temple and you suddenly remember that someone has something against you, leave your sacrifice there at the altar. Go and be reconciled to that person. Then come and offer your sacrifice to God" (Matthew 5:23-24).

9. Sour Words

Give each family member a super-sour gum ball to take home. At home, ask them to think about something they said recently that they wish they could take back. As they remember those words, have them chew the puckery gum and think about the sour effect of harsh words. Challenge family members to see how many days they can each guard their mouths and ensure that everything they say is true, kind, and necessary.

Scripture: "Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them" (Ephesians 4:29).

10. Prayer Walk

Ask families to discuss the areas in their lives where they're most struggling-perhaps school, a friendship, or doing chores. During the week, families can symbolically or physically visit the location where each person is struggling and pray for the person and situation. If it's possible, make a prayer walk or visit to the location. If not, use an item in the home, such as a friend's photograph or a textbook, as a prayer prompt.

Scripture: "Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere" (Ephesians 6:18).Danielle Bell has been a children's minister in Murfreesboro, Tennessee, for 10 years. Jennifer Hooks is managing editor for Children's Ministry Magazine.